Walczak Watch Over (Mayo All Over It)

Bob Mayo's hibernation has ended: Walczak is to file his G20 lawsuit in federal court tomorrow morning.

All lines on the timing of the filing are CLOSED on the Propositions Board (far right column). No tickets paid until filing occurs.

The city lawyers against Walczak should resemble the Pirates against . . . well, just about anyone.

UPDATE: Lawsuit filed. Propositions Board adjusted.

Reading is Fundamental

(1) If there is ever a judgment day, some people will have some 'splainin' to do with respect to Cameron Todd Willingham. Texas Gov. Rick Perry, in particular, should at his final breath be hoping fervently that the God he has leaned on so ostentatiously for his political career doesn't exist. Oh, and Texas sucks.

(2) Michael Jackson is a weird, sad and objectionable story from several perspectives, to the point of being nearly inexplicable; this story, though, might make sense.

(3) I love science.

(4) I had planned to wait until a social conservative named on the Propositions Board was found inappropriately pants-free before revisiting the rule that every 'gays threaten the traditional marriage I revere' hypocrite advocate is a sex scandal that hasn't yet been revealed, but sometimes events overtake plans.

Today's G20=Apocalypse Sign: Security Perimeters Established, Walczak Watch Begins

The map released by the feds today seems sensible (although I can't understand why a block of Grant Street seems to be included in the pedestrian-restricted zone). If vehicles are denied access along Grant Street, some of the practical detours could involve Wilmerding.

Next: Vic Walczak files his lawsuit in federal court. Odds posted (far right column). My money is on this Thursday. And on Walczak.

UPDATE: It is now Thursday, and if I were in Vic Walczak's position, I would file my G20 claims today, in federal court (after providing notice to the defendants earlier this week), and request a prompt hearing. A good time to catch the walk down Grant Street might be shortly after 10 a.m. Betting lines become ineffective the moment Walczak enters the courthouse, so wager early.

UPPERDATE: I was off by a day, apparently because the city requested a late meeting, and advertised an announcement that could influence the ACLU's thinking. The meeting occurred, the announcement was made . . . and the lawsuit will be filed Friday morning.


(Pregame analysis, with detailed ranking of those calling the shots.)

It's Official: The Pirates Are Pittsburgh's Team

After comparing Bob Nutting's statement commemorating the Pirates' record-setting loss to Luke Ravenstahl's recent statements about Pittsburgh's finances and direction, I have concluded that the only substantive difference between the Pirates' organization and the City of Pittsburgh government is that the National League publishes standings.

The Propositions Board has been adjusted accordingly. Anyone who bet the Pirates would not become The Worst Franchise In The Recorded History Of America's Major Professional Sports should consider giving a formal power of attorney to a small child, a pet, or a houseplant.

Make It Official: Boselovic Rules West Virginia

President Obama should appoint Len Boselovic Governor-General of West Virginia (modeled on Taft in the Phillippines). This would constitute a demotion for Boselovic, who already owns the entire state, but journalists tend to be altruists.

Does anyone know how that Robert Coury line of personal care products is coming along? I have a hunch that Don Blankenship could be ordering by the truckload soon.

Insolvency, Inschmolvency -- It's Football Time!

• Football season is here, which means it's time for "next Steelers arrest" lines on the Propositions Board (far right column).
• Jonathan Baldwin could make a high school quarterback look good, and Dino Lewis appears to be a reliable back. Cam Sadler and Nate Byham may develop into weapons as the season progresses. Pitt seems likely to rise or fall at quarterback, but fans can always hope.
• Any Roethlisberger-at-QB team with a league-average defense would struggle to reach .500. Any defensive line with Casey Hampton would be effective.

UPDATE: Steve Pederson's return to Pitt apparently has generated a resumption of lying about attendance at Pitt home football games. I was at Heinz Field on Saturday; 48,496 other people were not. The stadium was roughly half-full. I thought Bob Smizik had shamed Pitt into reporting realistic figures when he observed, after a Halloween weekend game during Pederson's first run here, that half the announced crowd must have been wearing empty-seat costumes. Self-respect should incline Pitt to entrust calculation of football attendance to the Department of Mathematics, because the Department of Athletics obviously isn't up to the task.

Maybe Acklin's Challenge Wasn't A Failure?

This is for Acklin fans who continue to defend the signature challenge:

Kevin Acklin wasted a lot of money, issued some big-talk press releases, and failed comprehensively. Which, if you think about it, is not necessarily a bad campaign strategy:



City voters traditionally elect the mayoral candidate who best embodies that record.

Acklin has some catchin' up to do.

More Angry, Drunk(en), Worthwhile Ranting . . .

Part 3 of the Angry Drunk (Drunken, if he sobers enough to handle grammar) Bureaucrat's G-20 Visitors Guide has been published. This installment requires a couple of corrections:

First, Donnie Iris deftly dominates the local pop scene; the original Iron City Houserockers (right) are the town's rockers. No volume of alcohol excuses that mistake.

Second, Primanti Brothers sandwiches feature oil-and-vinegar-dressed cabbage, not cole slaw. Also, any out-of-towner must be warned that a cheesesteak is unavailable at Primanti Brothers, despite the menu's claim; ordering a cheesesteak yields a mediocre-or-worse hamburger (so go with capicola, pastrami and/or bacon, all great).

Today's G20=Apocalypse Moment, With Snipers

Managers of one downtown building told tenants this week that those occupants crazy enough determined to attempt to conduct business at their leased premises during the G20 event must impose foolproof, 'no exceptions' measures to prevent employees from working after dark.

'Why?' one tenant inquired.

'Because we have been informed that if the snipers see anyone moving inside our building after dark, and one of the VIPs is being moved in our vicinity at that time, there is a chance someone will be shot, and we want to avoid that, so we think 'no exceptions' is the right policy on this issue.'

The bright side: The tenants were told to expect a three-hour security process for admission to the building each day during the event (involving navigation of three successive, increasingly severe security checkpoints) . . . but that leaving the secured area is expected to take no more than 90 minutes.

A Tale Of Two Headlines And One Clustermuck

Before using the links, guess which of these headlines is part of today's Post-Gazette, and which is offered by the Tribune-Review.

Then, try to square this

State pension system says Pittsburgh funding plan 'valid'

with

Analysis finds mayor's pension plan might work, but . . .
. . . reaching several funding goals remain 'ifs'

????????

An explanation may have been provided, inadvertently, in the first article:

"I think everybody feels we're under pressure to get something done here," Rep. Dan Frankel, D-Squirrel Hill, said yesterday.

UPDATE: The Trib subbed a 'reprieve' story for its original 'mayor's plan valid' story. There wasn't much to the first story beyond the headline.

A Paltry Scuffle Exposes A Genuine Problem

The contest for the sad seat between Mark DeSantes DeSantis and Patrick Dowd in the "I Woulda Been Mayor 'Cept I Couldn't Even Beat Luke" support group has generated remarkable intensity among supporters of Kevin Acklin and Dok Harris (hint: you'll both be welcome at meetings, guys).

The recent sparks came from an Acklin-arranged challenge of signatures on Harris' nomination petition, an episode that involved an ugly, silly little corner of Pennsylvania election law.

A candidate must file a nominating petition bearing a specified number of signatures of registered voters eligible to vote for the relevant office. That seems reasonable. The hoops through which a signature must jump to be counted are not. A ridiculous series of court decisions disenfranchises many legitimate signers.

If "Albert Einstein" signs as Al or Bert, his signature is invalid (although it can be rescued if Albert appears in court to testify or -- if the judge is in a lenient mood -- submits a notarized affidvit). If Albert registered as Albert Luke Einstein but signs as Albert L. Einstein (or vice versa), the signature is (relatively) bad.

(Do you remember precisely how you signed your original voter registration card?)

If Albert lives in Dormont but has a Pittsburgh mailing address, and writes "Pittsburgh" on the petition, his signature is susceptible to challenge. If Albert lives in Pittsburgh and writes "Pgh" on the petition (because the forms required by the County Board of Elections don't provide enough space for most people to write "Pittsburgh" comfortably), his signature may be challenged. If Albert lives in Squirrel Hill and writes "Squirrel Hill" as his address, his signature is inadequate -- he should have written "Pittsburgh." If Albert is registered at his family's home in Squirrel Hill but uses his dormitory address in Oakland, his signature is worthless. If Albert's new wife signs her married name, before changing her voting registration, her signature is worthless.

This indefensible system is tolerated because (a) few citizens are aware of it and (b) the two principal political parties like the enormous obstacle confronting anyone trying to crash their tango. To his substantial credit, Judge Joseph James of the Allegheny County Court of Common Pleas is customarily sensible when applying the rules, relying on common sense rather than a hypertechnical reading of silly standards. That, however, does not stop some candidates and lawyers -- often aiming solely to deplete an opponent's resources -- from filing detailed challenges.

Against this background, I am unimpressed by huffing about how 'almost half of Harris' signatures were discarded' or preening press releases and unbecoming whining about the "sloppiness" of Harris' petition.

Harris' petition apparently was more amateurish than most, but Acklin has little room to complain. I am confident that nearly or more than half of Acklin's signatures were objectionable, too -- not because he or his circulators or his signers did anything wrong, but because Pennsylvania law subjects such signatures to an effective thicket of "gotcha" traps.

Acklin's challenge had scant chance to succeed; Harris submitted three times as many signatures as he needed, and more than a quarter of his supporters somehow stumbled their way to a pristine signature. Too many unchallenged signatures, too many challenged (some of which sure to be rehabilitated) signatures, too much mountain for Acklin to reasonably expect to overcome. For that reason, it is difficult to divine Acklin's reasoning. He and Harris were required to devote substantial time, money and effort to the litigation. The only winner? Luke Ravensthal, the guy they will both be muttering about at those therapy sessions, beginning in mid-November.

Just Keep Repeating: 'It's OK, Vic Will Handle It'

Chris Potter deftly covers worthy points on the Pittsburgh council beat -- from G20 preparations to Jim Motnik's revelation that he will not allow being elected a district judge to interfere with his disdain for the state constitution -- but Chris' fretting about prospective policies and procedures governing dissent at G20 (and perhaps, unsettlingly, beyond) suggests the First Rule of G20 requires repetition:


The rules are not The Rules until Vic Walczak and Donetta Ambrose say so.

The "New" Post-Gazette: Even More Non-Plussed

This week began with an exciting new development at the Post-Gazette , rooted in the future (well, OK, maybe the recent and inglorious past), but my attempt to warn the intrepid Reg Henry about certain dangers of P-G+ provided a buzzkill reminder that the Post-Gazette seems overmatched by the Intertubes Era. In particular, the comments feature of the P-G (nonplussed edition) apparently can not handle rudimentary links.

With Labor Day just around the corner, this seems a natural time to pull together that telethon. Any city that wishes to maintain delusions of solvency should probably have a newspaper with a Google-capable Intertubes apparatus.

'It's A Long, Desperation Pass...A Collision ... Some Confusion...And, Wait! Now Harris Has The Ball! It's Harris! Harris Is Still Running!!"

Judge Joseph James is reported to have rejected a bid to remove Dok Harris' name from Pittsburgh's mayoral election ballot.

The numbers (too many unchallenged signatures, plus too many challenged signatures) made this a longshot from the beginning, and a strange dumb strategic move by Acklin. (By the way, has Acklin publicly admitted his role? If so, I missed it and would appreciate enlightenment; if not, Acklin's reputation takes an unnecessary and strange hit.) In any event, Harris devoted time, money and effort to defending his ballot position.

The Propositions Board (far right column) will be adjusted accordingly (those who bet on the challenge are losers; the November odds are unchanged).

UPDATE: The Tribune-Review's initial report contains a curious sentence:

Judge Joseph M. James said the Harris campaign can fix the problems within five days.

This could be a showstopper or a trifle, depending on the nature of "the problems," and creates doubt about the value of each newspaper's first report.

A Nonplussed Subscriber To Post-Gazette Plus

I hope Post-Gazette Plus succeeds. I want journalism to prosper and would enjoy expanded local news.

I will join despite a disappointing preview, which seems heavy on sports but light on local news and analysis (unless a Jack Kelly rant about how he suspects a primary election candidate for tax collector in some Mon Valley hamlet is soft on missile defense and torture is the perfect complement to your bagel and decaffeinated Constant Comment).

Is there no interesting, persuasive conservative voice available to the P-G? (Advice to Reg: Take it easy on Kelly until you get a written, notarized legal opinion on your susceptibility to a manslaughter rap -- with specific reference to the 'beating an unarmed man senseless, especially when the unarmed man is senseless' doctrine -- and an unqualified indemnification backed by the certified personal guarantees of all living Blocks.)

Let's hope PG+ offers worthwhile (non-Steelers) local content. Surely there is an audience for plenty of local news that never reaches the pages of the nonplussed P-G.