Saturday, April 3, 2010

A Sign Greater Than All The Sermons By All The Preachers At All The Pulpits In All The Lands?

On Holy Thursday, an "angry" Bishop David Zubik was pandering righteously to his followers from the pulpit at St. Paul's Cathedral, drawing a standing ovation by damning a "rush to judgment" against the Catholic Church (which systematically facilitated and concealed widespread sexual abuse of children by its employees).

Before another dawn arrived, Bishop Zubik was struck down by one of the most painful afflictions known to man.

Perhaps there is a just God.

If so, this guy is in a hell of a lot of trouble.

Because if complaining about those seeking to hold the church to account for damnable moral and legal crimes is punishable by swift onset of "excruciating" pains that drive man to his kness, mortal synapses can only wonder at the penalty to be imposed for likening those critics to Jew-persecuting Nazis.


Ceti eel?

Pirates season tickets?

UPDATE: Just as Commander Chekov was spared when the cortex-snuggling Ceti Eel inexplicably crawled back out Chekov's ear, Bishop Zubik recovered from surgery and celebrated Easter Mass.


Anonymous said...

On Easter weekend? Was this really necessary?

People have been trying to destroy the Church for thousands of years. They will continue to try and whether or not they know it those people are acting with the fallen angels' help. They will fail.

Infinonymous said...

After consideration of the preceding comment, a clarification for fairness:

Not all creepy perverts or moralizing authoritarians become part of the Catholic church: some become school administrators in Alabama.

Bram Reichbaum said...

I fail to see where criticizing the man or even the institution is trying to "destroy" anything.

I understand some of the aggrieved feelings for the writer's rank irreverence, but he didn't say anything untoward about The Lord Most High. There are multitudes among the laity that are feeling aggrieved for their own reasons, and he was offering them some compassion and emotional relief.

Infinonymous said...

Bishop Zubik and Father Cantalamessa chose the time to raise this issue.

Against the background of their institution's decades of corrupt, evil and ongoing conduct, they should have stayed quiet. Instead, they expressed arrogance and self-pity when contrition and humility were indicated.

If a sudden appearance of kidney stones was a manifestation of divine judgement, point for justice and for the divine.

Anonymous said...

The Church doesn't need external help. It will wither and die from within. I was Catholic until like Paul the scales fell from my eyes...then I realized that all religion is hokum. I don't need faith in some invisible deity to believe in myself.

Thanks to the Church this planet was set back a millennium. We have it to thank for the Dark Ages, the Crusades, the Inquisition, countless holy wars...a pox on all their houses...especially the one in Rome.

Infinonymous said...

It is said that cardinal once dismissed Napoleon's threat to destroy the Catholic church by observing that the church's leaders had been unable to do so in more than a thousand years despite strenous effort.

I do not expect the failures and offenses of men such as that cardinal's successors to destroy the church. But any other entity that had engaged in the widespread, systematic evil of the abuse scandal would have been shuttered and bankrupted (with plenty of jailings) long ago. The beneficiaries of such leniency should confess, request forgiveness and shut up.

Infinonyfan said...

Impalement? ceti eel? Pirate season tickets?

Is Gene Collier or Dennis Miller writing this stuff?

Spent 20 minutes reading up on impalement. wtf is wrong with people? I mean seriously w-t-f??