Saturday, July 16, 2011

Big Ben Rolls Right When Playing For Jesus

Christ Church at Grove Farm -- a breakaway right-wing church serving Sewickley residents for whom the local Episcopal church did not serve enough political and cultural wingnuttery -- will provide the setting for Ben Roethlisberger's wedding to Ashley Harlan.

Why Christ Church at Grove Farm? Because Ben (right, apparently confused about which jersey goes with which team) -- when he isn't playing for Jesus or skating on nailing half-conscious underage drinkers in rest rooms -- worships there.

Faithfully, no doubt.

Infytune: Jesus Of Suburbia, Green Day

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Episcopalian" is a noun.

"Episcopal" is an adjective.

An Episcopalian is a person who attends an Episcopal church.


Your story should read "Episcopal church" not "Episcopalian church."

You are obviously not one of the "Frozen chosen" or you would know the difference! ;-)

Infinonymous said...

Thank you for the information.

MH said...

If we're correcting things, you should also note that Green Day kind of sucks.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, every time I see a bus kiosk advertising the church I'm like, what's up with that name? It's a perfect fit for the McMansion faithful living at Heritage Plantations at Turkey Gobbler Hollow Ridge and the like.

Infinonymous said...

Green Day is excellent. The combination of worthwhile lyrics and strong performance is becoming rare (and not just in Pittsburgh, which has noticeably fallen off the touring "A list," but in general), which makes Green Day's strength all the more important.