Although the temptation to mock British vacuity (newly titled Baron Carrickfergus in carriage, left) is understandable today, Americans should exercise the caution they have ignored in elevating the Kardashians, the Trumps and the Palins to national points of fascination. Cue: The guest list for the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, a spirited race to the bottom of our culture.
For an event honoring award-winning journalists, ABC News ignored most of its newsgatherers and invited professional model Erin Andrews; People magazine responded by inviting semi-professional imbecile Bristol Palin (left in picture at right, celebrating her high school pregnancy with tequila), daughter of consummate professional imbecile Sarah Palin.
Bloomberg invited Brooke Burke, host of Andrews and Bristol Palin on "Dancing With The Stars." USA Today's table will feature estranged C-listers Courtney Cox and David Arquette (left); CNN's, celebrity trainwreck Paula Abdul; The Hill's, nondescript basketballer John Wall; The New Yorker's, B-list actors Jon Hamm and Zach Galifianakis.
The Fox News table will be inhabited by "family values" leader Newt Gingrich and prospective Mrs. Gingriches Kate Hudson, Bridget Moynahan, Alyssa Milano, Patricia Arquette (sister, not ex-wife, of David Arquette) and Amber Riley.
The Washington Post's guests will include Donald Trump (left in picture at right, apparently ignoring whose head should be shaved), serial shedder of creditors and trophy wives, which means a Palin and a Trump are among those to be addressed by President Obama at this year's national commemoration of journalistic achievement; no word yet concerning any of the Kardashians.
Infytune: Idiot's Delight, Bruce Springsteen and Joe Grushecky
2 hours ago